Writing a letter to your present self from your future self is extremely powerful.
You get advice from the inner wisdom you already have but have trouble accessing otherwise.
When you ask yourself advice from your future self, she usually knows what you should do.
Even more powerful is using this exercise to learn how to create the results you want in the future (such as losing weight, making money, or meeting your dream man).
In this episode you’ll learn how to write a Future Self Letter than helps you create the exact future you want.
Here are my favorite resources to go with this podcast:
- How To Write A Future Self Letter (blog post)
- Visualizing Your Future Self (podcast)
- How To Predict Your Future (blog post)
- How To Live An Intentional Life (free training)
- Grow You (coaching)
Full Episode Transcript
Welcome to the Design Your Dream Life podcast where it’s all about designing your life on your terms and now your host, Natalie Bacon.
Hello my friend. How are you doing? It is the holidays. It is Christmas, so Merry Christmas and if you don’t celebrate Christmas, Merry Christmas anyway. That’s how I roll. I am really, really thankful for you and I am thankful for this past year and I love this season as I’ve already mentioned because not only is it filled with love and the holidays but it’s also the time for me to reflect, think about this last year, and plan next year.
Today we are going to be talking about the future self letter. This is a tool that I use all of the time and I love it. I know, I kind of mentioned it last week when I talked about how my future self and these letters would always tell me that I was a non drinker, so I wanted to do an entire episode on it so that you can really use this tool as something very practical to apply, you know, something that kind of seems woo when people talk about manifesting and you know when I say creating your future from your future, it sounds great, but then it’s like, okay, well how do I do it?
This is one of the tools that you can use, and I’ve used it in my personal life, in my business. I did this for how I wanted to create my business, including live events. If you haven’t gotten your ticket to design your dream life live, you must. It is the only chance for you to get coached live by me and work with me in person. Go to Nataliebacon.com/lifeevent. That’s one word, liveevent. It is going to sell out. It is going to be amazing. It’s in Chicago this year. It’s just going to be really fun.
So why I am bringing that up is because I would think about my future and my business in these future self letters and part of that exercise helped me see how I wanted to run my business. So instead of reacting to the opportunities that come my way, whether it’s a speaking engagement or you know, a sponsorship opportunity, I think about my future self and the revenue I’m going to create in my business and how operations are going to go. I kind of have three legs of my business. I have the self paced programs that you can kind of purchase and take at your own pace. I have the more interactive coaching that you can get from me that’s kind of like a gym membership. That’s the grow you coaching, that’s a gym for your mind. Right? And then I have live events, so just starting that third leg of my business. The reason I’m doing it is because that’s how I’ve thought about creating my business model in my future. And this is all coming from the visualizing that I do and the future self letters are a part of that.
That’s what I want to teach you how to do today. This fits in very well with the episode of visualizing your future self and also the Being List episode and the Direction vs. Intention episode. So if you haven’t listened to those, listen to those. I think kind of refreshing yourself on all of those tools right now would be really, really valuable because naturally during this time of year, at least for me, it’s just really, really fun to look back with intention and look forward with intention. Part of that is going to be this future self letter.
I want you to know for sure that advice from your future self is always the best advice because it requires you to go inward and get answers from your highest self. So remember the future only exists in your mind. Your body is going to naturally create your future from your past. So your body’s kind of dragging you into this predictable future based on what you did previously. Okay? But you don’t have to do that. You don’t have to create a future like your past, but it takes this kind of mental practice of detaching from your past self through creating different thoughts, feelings, and actions. Right now it’s just your primitive brain, right? It’s memorized, a way of thinking. And that way of thinking, you know, through your memories and your experiences have created memorized feelings. So your brain loves to be efficient and it’s just going to keep doing what it’s always done. So you’re going to keep thinking and feeling the same and therefore you’re going to keep creating the same actions and results, even if you learn how to take different actions. So that is why I can give a hundred people the steps to create an online business or you know, to change your eating habits or to coach yourself, or whatever it is, to fix your relationships. And there will be a hundred different results because the thoughts and feelings of each person are different.
It’s not that your reality helps you change your results so you don’t wait for the circumstances to change, for you to change. You change and then your reality will change. It’s the reverse. So your thoughts create your feelings, your feelings create your actions, and your actions create your results. So all of the results that you have right now in your life are the effect of previous thoughts and feelings. And this is just good to know. How much you weigh, your relationship status, who you’re in relationship with, whether you’re making six figures or seven figures or less than six figures, that is the result that you’ve created for yourself based on previous thinking. If you want to create a different result in the future, you have to become someone totally different.
And I’ve talked about this a lot, but I am constantly looking for ways to teach you in a simpler, easier way. So the future self letter is one of that, but I want you to kind of know what we’re talking about. And this is quantum physics. So you cause an effect by changing your energy, by changing your thoughts and feelings, not the other way around. So your thoughts and feelings will always create your results. Just know that your body doesn’t know the difference between what’s real and what’s not real. Now that is a real woo sentence, but I’m going to break it down for you. If you feel fear from watching a movie. So you watch a movie, that’s a scary movie, let’s say, and you’re thinking thoughts and it’s creating real fear in your body so your body actually experiences the fear. That’s the same type of emotional fear as if you were going to quit your job, right? And you feel that fear. You’re thinking a thought that causes the fear. It’s the same fear. It’s the same emotion.
I had a friend, a law school friend, whose OBGYN had her stop listening to political podcasts when she was pregnant because it was stressing the baby out. And I thought this was so fascinating, right? Because what’s happening is that your body is feeling real stress. Now it doesn’t know whether the stress is caused from you actually experiencing the thing or you just listening to something about someone else going through the thing. It’s real stress. And this is really, really important for you to understand. The stress does not come from the circumstance. The stress comes from your thoughts about the circumstance. This is everything because it means that if you change your thoughts and your feelings and who your being, you change your results.
So if you decide what you want your future to look like and you visualize it, you will create that and it requires you to get really good at using your imagination. That’s why it’s important for you to start to do this with your eyes closed. It makes it a little bit easier. And then also an add on to that is to write letters from your future self to yourself now.
I did this and that’s what I alluded to in last week’s episode when I quit drinking. There are lots of reasons to quit drinking alcohol and there are lots of reasons to keep drinking alcohol. It would have been very easy and I think a lot of people would have thought it justified for me to never drink or have always been a nondrinker because of the reason of my dad being an alcoholic, but to me that just wasn’t compelling. Like I always have thought like that’s his business, not mine. Right? So I actually made the decision to become a nondrinker because I would do this exercise of writing letters from my future self to me now, and I’m going to get to the steps of how to do that after this example, but I would always do this exercise and it would always come back that I was a nondrinker and I was just curious about that.
I didn’t resist it the first time I did it and I kind of had that wisdom delivered to me through this exercise. I wasn’t, you know, immediately jumping to that. I wasn’t immediately fighting it. I was just curious about it. I thought, hmm, that’s really interesting. But for the past year and a half, at the least, all of my letters from my future self always had me as a nondrinker. So you know that wisdom was kind of there, but at the time I was just more curious about it and I wasn’t really ready, I would say.
And eventually, actually a couple months ago in October, I just got tired of seeing it in the future and I just decided to do it now. I decided to become that person and now I just kind of identify as someone who prefers not to drink. I didn’t go to the place of limiting my drinks or reducing my drinking. I just decided to kind of skip all of that, reduce all the chatter, and just instantly become a non drinker. And I want you to know that that’s available to you.
Joe Dispenza talks about this in one of my favorite books of all time, which is Breaking The Habit Of Being Yourself, it’s like if you do matter to matter, right, you will save money kind of month by month and build that emergency fund and try to invest up to a million dollars, right? That’s the matter to matter. That’s looking at your current results and looking at what you need to do as the person who you already are to get the results. Or you can do it the other way, which is to totally just skip all of that and skip all the time it takes and the effort, right, and just jump to the person who is someone who attracts $1 million. And I just prefer to do things that way. I don’t really like the slow route.
Now this doesn’t mean that I’m in a rush cause if you’re in a rush that’s like a red flag that you’re trying to escape something. So you want to be onto yourself and not be in a rush, but you want to be manifesting who you want to become. So I prefer not to think about, you know, going the slow and steady route to creating $1 million. I prefer to become someone who is on the same vibe or energy field or has the same thoughts and feelings of someone who already just has $1 million. Right? So that’s what I did for drinking as well. Instead of kind of thinking about, “Oh, do I want to reduce it?” “Do I want to go down to only planning my drinks?” It’s just a lot of chatter. I was just like, nah, I’m out. I’m just going to be a nondrinker now.
It’s up to you. You can take the longer route. I just find that why do that when you can just kind of make it happen so much faster. But it does require you to give up who you’ve been. And this is really scary. I always go back to this Netflix documentary I watched, gosh, I can’t remember the name of it, but it’s one of those woo documentaries kind of about spiritual wellbeing and kind of Eastern medicine in a way. And this woman was talking about being healed. Yeah. It was actually about healing. And right before she was healed, she said, I don’t know who I am without my disease. And that sentence is really at the heart of what I’m talking about here.
We have attached to our personalities and our personalities are just our thoughts and feelings and actions, right? This persona that we’ve put on, we have attached to them so much so that even if we think we want to get rid of them, it’s scary and we don’t know who we want to be instead. So instead of getting rid of that identity, we just stay in that identity because it’s comfortable and we want to want the new result.
So it would be like when I was someone who had, you know, six figure student loan debt and I kind of identified as someone who was just in a lot of law school debt and I was like the struggling lawyer. I mean my life was still good, right? But, but I, there was this sense of that was who I was, right? I was like trying to get out of debt. In order to be someone who is debt free I had to become this person who didn’t even identify as having debt because the person who is debt free isn’t thinking about getting out of debt.
And the difference is everything. It’s like upleveling your life completely and getting rid of that identity. And it’s kinda hard to do. We call it in coaching, giving up your wubby. So if you are in grow you, you know all about the wubby, you did work on it this month and it’s hard for us. It’s like who am I without this problem that I have to solve. I like to give the example of someone who wants to lose weight. It’s kind of easy to think about. If you are someone who wants to lose fifty or a hundred pounds, and that is your goal. In order to actually do it, you have to be someone who isn’t even thinking about food. Like you don’t even have the desire to lose that weight and to stop eating all of the sweets or stop eating all of you know the calories. You’re just someone who doesn’t even have that desire. So it’s not the opposite of it. It’s totally different and it’s really uncomfortable. But if you do it right, there’s kind of like this peace.
So it’s also like with relationships, it’s like wanting to meet the man of your dreams and you think about all the qualities you want in this partner. You have to become that person who has those qualities. And when you’re that person, when you’re the person that the person you want is looking for you attract them. It’s not the other way around. All right. So all of these are examples of kind of how you become this person ahead of time, how you make sure you’re headed in the right direction and you be her instead of wanting to be her and wanting to know how to be her. It’s the slightest difference, but it’s how you get the results.
So now let’s talk about how to write this wonderful letter that will bring you so much wisdom. There’s lots of different ways you can do this exercise. I want you to do it by writing a letter from your future self to yourself now. So you can do it in a way that is from your self now to your future self or you can do it from your self now to your past self. But I think the most value comes from when you write it to yourself now from yourself in the future. You can do this one year from now, you can do it five years from now, you can do it twenty years from now. I think all of them are very valuable.
I like to do it, you know, in like the three to five year mark. And then I’ll do it one year as well. I’ll do two of them. I’ll do like, okay, what does my life look like in five years? And so I’ll put at the top the date. So I will put, you know, December, 2024 and I will write a letter to myself and I will write about the results that I have. So I used to write these and it used to say that I was a non-drinker. Some other things that are on my five year future self letter is that, you know, I work out daily and I actually have a personal trainer. I am married, I have two dogs. I live in a beautiful condo downtown. I have a home office, it’s in its own room. I work about three to four days a week. And in my downtime, obviously I’m with my family and doing personal things. But I also read a lot and I’m constantly learning and growing. My business creates about $2 million in revenue from programs, from coaching and from live events. I have thousands of members in grow you. My business has a team of about five people. I hold about two live events per year and they always sell out, right? So I get really specific about the results. I do this with the money, right? I just have $100,000 sitting in savings. I have millions of dollars in my investment accounts, right? I like having money just like I do now. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a change, right? It can just be continuing, right? I’m debt free. So it’s like I work out daily now, right? About four to six days a week. And I think that will stay the same. It’s not always going to be something different, but it is going to be what your results are, right?
I have kids. So think about what your results will be in your future because the only place the future exists is in your mind. And whether you realize it or not, you’re creating your future. So you’re by default going to create it from your past. Cause it’s just easy. And that’s what your brain does. Your brain like loves to be efficient. So when you wake up, it’s just going to create more of the same thoughts and the same feelings that you’ve been creating in the past. Unless you do this work and slow yourself down and create new thoughts and new feelings. I also don’t just write about the results. I write about what I’m thinking. I write about how I’m not worried about getting to $1 million. So the person who creates $1 million isn’t thinking about how to create $1 million. What is she thinking about? That is where my work is.
So for you, what result do you want to have in five years and how did you get those results and not just the results, but what are your thoughts and feelings in five years? So if you want to lose fifty pounds and in your future, you’re fifty pounds lighter, you’re not thinking about how to lose fifty pounds. You’re not really going into the restaurant and being stressed out about what to order. It’s not even on your mind. And this is awkward and different because you have to give up your identity now. And we like our wubbies, we like to hold on to the story even if it’s not serving us. And I just want you to be onto yourself.
Also, what advice do you have for you now? And this is just a good one, if you’re ever struggling to make a decision. I did this, I gave this one to my brother the other day. He was struggling with a decision and I just said in five years from now, what will you have hoped that you have done? It’s just such an easy clear way for you to filter decisions, right? And it’s often the harder thing, but it’s also kind of sometimes the boring thing.
So I quit drinking. My life is different. I’m just a non-drinker. What about your life is different with these results and what about your life is the same? And when you write a letter from your future self, you visualize and you become this person ahead of time and that’s how you create the result. You attract it into your life instead of forcing it and doing the matter to matter where you’re trying to kind of go through time slowly to change your results. Instead, you just totally change who you are internally and your thoughts and feelings and you take on an entirely new persona, an entirely new personality, and it’s scary, but it is worth it if you ever want to change your future.
So I have a completely new identity than I had five years ago. It’s super fun to do this work and then over time, look back. So five years ago, it was 2014. I was just starting a blog. I was a lawyer, I had a ton of student loan debt and I started to imagine a completely different future for myself. And over the last five years I’ve created who I am today. I got out of debt, I switched careers twice. I became a life and business coach. I moved to Chicago. I stopped dating guys who didn’t fit my future vision and I started dating someone who is thoughtful and loving and caring and wants the same things that I want in the future. I am so happy I decided to do this work. I created my future from my future instead of creating more of the past.
It was harder, but it was so worth it, right? Because now I am so thankful and appreciative I did that work. I am looking out my window and I have this beautiful view of the city and today I get to work on my business and I get to coach clients and I’m really living the exact life that I want to be living. And I had to give up so much to get here and it’s worth it. But you have to have that awareness of letting go. So that’s what I want for you.
Something fun to do. If you go to afutureme.org you can type out a letter and have it sent to you via email in the future. It’s also really fun to read letters that people publish publicly on that site. It is supposed to be to future you from the current you, but you could do it in the reverse, which is what I suggest. You can do it from future you to current you because whether you realize it or not, you’re creating your future right now. So if you keep doing what you’re doing now, where will you be in five years?
If you are not getting the results that you want, if they are slow to come to you, it is because you are focusing too much on wanting it and the how instead of being the person who has those results. If you’re stuck in the how, you’re not doing it right. So I want you to take a step back and become that person and write a letter from your future self and ask her questions that you want answers to ask her. You know, how do I get to lose fifty pounds? How do I meet my dream guy? How do I buy my house with cash? How do I create a six figure business and then have your future self tell you the answers.
Are you worried about the things that you worry about now when you have the results? So I do this a lot. I think about when I have the results, the seven figure business, when I have thousands of members in Grow You, what will I be thinking about? What will I be feeling? And I try to match that energy. Now there will be a gap until you get the results because there is no other way, but for it to come to you when you actually match that energy. So I make six figures in my business so easily. Like I even launched a new leg of my business, the coaching program, right? Grow You. It was so easy to get it to six figures. Just that leg of it alone, right? Because I just, I just am that person and until I match the energy of the person who does that for seven figures, there’s going to be this gap and this disconnect.
So it’s really important for me to visualize, to make my being lists, to write letters from my future self because the more that I am in that place where my thoughts and feelings are someone who has the result I want, the more I’m going to raise my frequency and attract that into my life. It is a practice that you can get really, really good at and it’s really fun to appreciate yourself and appreciate having the results ahead of time. It’s really, really fun to do. You can be thankful for and love the results that you’re creating in your mind even if you don’t have it yet.
So I am so thankful for a seven figure business that I’ve created and I operate on that frequency and that is working because I see my revenue increasing and the more it increases, the closer I am to being 100% aligned. So if it’s not working for you, if you are not seeing your results improve or you’re not making progress on your goals, take a step back from all of the actions and get out of the how and go back to writing letters from your future self and get really specific on what the thoughts are and feelings are and actions are of the person who has the results that you want.
This is something that I highly recommend you not only do right now during this time of reflection and intention and goal setting, but also do it regularly as part of your morning practice, at least weekly where you’re writing a letter from your future self to your current self. Because if you don’t, you will stay in the day to day and you will use your circumstances as evidence for repeating your past. And instead what I want you to do is kind of ignore those circumstances and your current results and practice becoming the person and being the person who has the thoughts and feelings and actions of the person who has the results you want. You can use this for anything in your life, personal, health, business, career. What is the person who has the results that you want? Thinking, what are they feeling? How are they acting? How are they making decisions about something you’re thinking about? Write that letter and you will find the infinite wisdom and the answers that you’re looking for. All right, I’ll talk to you next week.
Hey, if you liked this podcast and really should check out, Grow You, my life coaching program. I coach you on everything I teach on the podcast so that you can uplevel your life. We 10x it so you get the results you want most. Just like a monthly gym membership to get your body in shape, this is a monthly personal development membership to get your mind in shape. It is an investment your future self will thank you for. Check it out at Nataliebacon.com/coaching. That’s Nataliebacon.com/coaching. I will see you there.